FUTURE MAN

The Longhorns added the much needed superstar quarterback to the 2013 class last week. Ladies and gents, Tyrone Swoopes:

Looks very familiar:

Apologies to Brewer, Ash, McCoy and Overstreet. I believe this is FUTURE MAN.

RUN RICKY RUN

I remember playing EA Sports NCAA football 97 against my roommate. I would use Texas and he would be Kentucky in our dynasty. I ran the HELL out of the option with Major Applewhite and Ricky Williams. (with much success.) Ricky went on to win the Heisman, Major to less success, becoming a college coach. Ricky had his ups and downs, but today he called it quits. Ricky Williams retired today, at the age of 34. I will always remember when I had Ricky on my fantasy team. I would go out with my friends on Saturday, sleep until about 2:00 PM on Sunday and go into work. I would have no idea what NFL games had transpired. When I got to work I would ask my boss, Tom, "How was Ricky?" He responded with one of two answers. "Ricky was Ricky." or "Ricky wasn't Ricky." 

Here's to Ricky being Ricky. Not many people can say they lived like Ricky.


And now here is a complete lunatic:

Favorite play-by-play announcers

A subject I take much interest in: HEARTBREAK CITY

Keith Jackson/Craig Way
 (THE GREATEST SPORTS PLAY OF MY LIFE)

Al Michaels

Brent Musburger

Jim Nantz

Bob Costas: My sportscasting hero is on the list for sure. He should be on everyone's list for nailing that sick bastard Sandusky in that interview!

Verne Lundquist:One of my top favorite calls of all time. I actually met Verne a few times working for the Radisson.

THE LEGEND: GUS JOHNSON
HAS THE BEST JOB IN THE WORLD.

 

PURPLE DRANK, LAWYA!

Purple drank is a slang term for a recreational drug popular in the hip hop community in the southern United States, originating in Houston, Texas. Its main ingredient is prescription-strength cough syrup containing codeine and promethazine.^[1] Cough syrup is typically mixed with ingredients such as Sprite soft drink or Mountain Dew and pieces of Jolly Rancher candy. The purplish hue of purple drank comes from dyes in the cough syrup.
Between 1991 and 1992, there was a large increase in use of purple drank in Houston.^[4] Purple drank has been considered to be a major influence in the making of and listening to chopped and screwed music due to its perceived effect of slowing the brain down, giving slow, mellow music its appeal. DJ Screw, however, repeatedly denounced the claim that one has to use purple drank to enjoy screwed and chopped music. Screw, a known user of purple drank, said he came up with chopped and screwed music when high on marijuana.<sup>[1]

This OF COURSE leads to Conway Twitty.</sup>

Favorite movie scenes: Attack of the Clones

Being a lifelong Star Wars maniac, the buzz on Episode 2 had my friends and I freaking out. Being the impatient idiot I am, I bought the book well before the release of the film. As I read this scene in the book, I realized George Lucas was finally giving me a gift I had been waiting for around 20 years. I attended the show with 7 or 8 friends. A couple of the guys had been giving me hell for reading the book before seeing the film. Around the 2:24 mark in this clip, I leaned over to my friend Josh Featherstone, seated next to me, and said "Get ready for this." 

 The theater went nuts. I had envisioned what those old Jedi had been like in their prime. None was more intriguing than Yoda. What a Hard Ass.

Favorite movie scenes: Inglourious Basterds

Two of the best characters I've seen in a while, Lt. Aldo Raine, and Col. Hans Landa.

 

There really is more to the next scene, but Youtube is restricted by copyright laws. Still, Chris Waltz was brilliant:

 

Favorite movie scene(s): Raging Bull

Martin Scorsese's masterpiece. The fact itlost the Oscar to "Ordinary People" was a fucking tragedy. I've got two scenes that I think make it the best boxing movie ever. (Although "When we were Kings" is a close second. First, the opening credits, beautiful:

Next, the fight against Sugar Ray Robinson. Scorsese used sounds of jungle animals, rifle shots, and melons being busted open during the barrage Lamotta willingly received on the ropes.

"You never got me down Ray" Is like "May the Force be with you" to me as far as movie quotes go. If you don't think that is beautiful, artistic cinema, go back to reality TV and "Twilight." You can expect Martin Scorsese to be in my top directors post for sure.

The "Bayless Conundrum"

I watch a lot of cooking shows. Food Network, Cooking Network, even a couple of foodie shows on Bravo and Travel Channel. The Wife and I consider ourselves professional "foodies." We've been to nearly every trendy restaurant in Austin. The man pictured above is celebrity chef Rick Bayless. He's a famous chef/author, who I've seen many times on television. He is one of the guys on these shows I really enjoy watching, he seems to be a very warm, friendly, happy soul. Yesterday, while scouring the web, like the Jedi I am, I came across some strange information. Rick Bayless' biological brother is pictured below:

HOW IN THE HELL DID SKIP BAYLESS COME OUT OF THE SAME WOMB AS RICK BAYLESS????

Yeah, I know. The most annoying, irritating, ignorant, angry little pricks to ever come out of Vanderbilt University is Rick Bayless' brother. I don't know anything about the parents of these two, but somewhere an apple fell not only from the tree, but out of state.
Just ask Terrell Suggs:

Agreed Terrell, DOUCHE BAG. 

This is what is so mind blowing:

Riddle me that one Batman!

Favorite movie scenes: Se7en(Spoiler warning)

There's just something about the way David Fincher does movies that appeals so much to me. I'm planning on doing a post on my favorite directors, and you can bet your ass he'll be top 3. Favorite quote, " California, tell your people to stay away. Stay away now, don't - don't come in here. Whatever you hear, stay away! John Doe has the upper hand!"

LET. THE BOY. WATCH.

 A lot of people around Austin talk about the QB position for a UT team LOADED with talent. My personal opinion is to start David Ash and redshirt incoming freshman Connor Brewer, the blue chip QB coming in. If he surpasses Ash in a year, so be it. But, as Ashley Schaeffer says, "LET THE BOY WATCH." (4:00 mark of the video) (This IS just an excuse to post a Eastbound and Down video.)

Favorite movie scenes: Glengarry Glenn Ross

PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN!

 

Rant of the day

A comprehensive list of things I hate hearing people say.

1. Just sayin'
2. Lex-Vegas
3. The 'ville
4. Body of work
5. Due dilligence
6. Ya know
7. At the end of the day
8. Anything Skip Bayless says
9. Stephen A. Smith
10. Oklahoma

What doesn't bother me? Shit Wookies say.

December 10, 2011

On that day, the New England Patriots cut Sterling Moore. December 14, he was re-signed to the practice squad. December 23, he was promoted to the active roster. On January 22, the 5'10 190lb 21 year old safety out of S.M.U. made the biggest play of his life.

Favorite music videos

I didn't even know they still made them. Thank you Youtube.

I'm da bes!

This might be the greatest rap video of all time. "win Street Fighter Turnamints." CLASSIC.

 

Charlie Weis is so special

A little late on this one. Why the hell does everybody want Charlie Weis as coach? He hasn't done a damn thing without Brady Quinn and Jeff Samardija. Florida looked like stir fried shit on offense last year. Oh well Charlie, good luck in the new Big 12. 

Lone Star Oops

When I started this thing, I promised myself NO POLITICS. But then I got this email. Everybody outside of Travis County loves this moron. They would probably agree to sell their first born to cover his miserable presidential run.
The email:


Billy,

During Rick Perry's presidential run he has wasted nearly $2.7 million taxpayer dollars on airfare, baggage fees, food and even parking. Tell Governor Rick Perry you want him to pay back the $2.7 million dollars of taxpayer money he spent on his race to Washington.

According to records from the Texas Department of Public Safety, we can project Perry’s security-related travel costs from the day he officially announced his candidacy to when he suspended his campaign on January 19. The $2,651,429.14 in Texas tax dollars he's wasted on jet liners and fancy hotels is money we'll never see again unless Perry pays us back.
Luckily, Rick Perry can pay taxpayers back today. According to Rick Perry’s latest ethics report, his state PAC has $2.47 million in the bank. He could repay 93% of what he owes us today by writing one simple check.

Write Rick Perry and tell him not to waste our hard earned investment in this state and pay taxpayers back immediately.
Sincerely,
Progress Texas

I thought MAYBE, he had a shot. Then this happened:

 And this:

MY GOD. The man was elected as governor of the state. I guess all the right wing lunatics outside of Austin don't see this guy like I do:

Nice try Yosemite Rick.